If I Ain’t Got You – Chapter 18

Chapter 18 — Romance is in the Air

Jan 1, 2003 – Orlando, FL – El Valentera – The Parking Lot

“Angela—Angie, stop!”  Kevin yelled, rushing to catch up to Angela as she strode across the parking lot.  Angela came to an abrupt stop, swinging around to face him.  “Angie…”

“What do you want Kevin?”  She asked, anger glinting in her eyes.

“I want to know who that woman was and why did she attack you like that,” Kevin replied with a frown on his face.

“That… The bitch was the bane of my damn existence.  Her name is Valgina and for four years in high school and several years afterwards, she made my life a living hell.  She stole my boyfriends and eventually my fiancée,” Angela retorted, turning to walk away from Kevin before he grabbed her arm, stopping her.

“Wait… Angie, are you okay?”  Kevin softly asked, brushing her hair away from her face, before letting his fingers stroke her cheek.  Angela visibly relaxed under his careful caresses, letting the anger she felt dissipate.

“I’m okay now,” Angela replied, turning her face into the soft touch like a cat.  A smile began to play across her lips as she looked up at Kevin.  “You called me Angie.”

“I guess I did, didn’t I,” Kevin replied with a grin, leaning down towards her as their eyes locked in a very heated gaze.  “Is that a good or bad thing?”

“When you say it, it’s a very good thing,” Angela responded, her eyes never leaving his.

“Well then I guess I’ll just have to call you Angie from now on… won’t I,” Kevin whispered, covering her lips with his own, both of them oblivious to the whistles and catcalls from the patrons coming out of the restaurant.

“I—I think we need to stop, before we get into something neither of us is ready for yet,” Angela spoke softly as she rested her head on Kevin’s shoulder when they finally broke the kiss.  Kevin held her close, hugging her tight before letting her go.

“You’re right… Let’s go see that movie we didn’t see last night,” he replied, taking her hand in his as the two of them walked hand-in-hand towards the car.

After Midnight – The Poole-Walden Estates – The Family Room

JT’s POV

It’s well after midnight and I’m sitting here, like a fool, wondering what’s going to happen next.  Since coming back home after his misunderstand, Mark hasn’t come in here.  Sometimes I wonder about Mark.  Why is he so jealous?  He should know by now that If I wanted to leave him, I would’ve left already.  If I wasn’t going to leave, it wouldn’t be with Dean of all people.  As for Dean, I told him to leave and not to come back here.  I don’t know what the hell he was thinking, coming here in the first place.  Damn, it’s the first of the new year and I don’t need all of this fucking drama.  Something’s got to give and real soon.  With the way the new year came in, I wonder what’s going to happen next.

“Are you coming up to bed baby?”  I heard behind me as I felt arms wrap around me.

“Do you want me to come to bed?”  I asked, turning slightly to look him in the face.

“You know I do.  You shouldn’t be down here, in the dark, all alone like this,” he said as I sighed.

“Maybe I should be down here, alone,” I said, moving away from him.  “You made up your mind Mark.  You didn’t even give me a fucking chance to say what had happened, you just jumped to conclusions, like you always do.”

“I know I did baby and I’m very sorry for that.  I shouldn’t have did what I did.  I should’ve listened to you.  I know you wouldn’t do something like that to me.  You love me too much to hurt me that way,” he said as I shook my head.

“I do love you Mark, but you need to get a grip on your anger, before you actually break us up,” I told him as he sighed and then sat down next to me.

“I know baby, I know.  I’m stressed with everything that’s happened,” he said just as the phone rang.

“Who in the hell could that be at this time of night?”  I asked, reaching over to the phone, answering it.  “Hello?”

“Yo’ JT, hey, is my bud Mark around?”  Jordan, one of his friends asked as I sighed and then handed him the phone.

“It’s Jordan… Why is he calling for you, at this time of night Mark?”  I asked, looking at him strangely, wondering why his friend, a friend he used to be really close with in the past was calling here this late.

“What’s up Jordan?”  He asked, looking at me strangely as he pressed the speaker button on the phone.

“Yo’ man, me and Joe are at a club and we need a ride.  We’re at the Playa’s Club down on Figueroa  and we need you to come pick us up and take us home,” Jordan’s voice rattled out through the speaker as I shook my head and then looked at him as I turned up my nose.

“I’m not coming out to get you two fools.  Call a damn cab or wake up Danny,” Mark said.

“Come on man, I don’t need the publicity of being seen leaving a gay club, riding in a damn taxi with the paparazzi taking pictures of me,” Jordan said as he shrugged his shoulders.

“Maybe you should’ve thought about that before you started drinking then.  I have other things going on.  Night Jordan, tell Joe I said hi and bye,” he said as he pressed the button to hang up the phone.

“So, the unhappy couple need a ride,” I said as I looked at him, wondering was he really going to leave them hanging like that.

“They just need a ride.  Both of them are drunk and you heard him, he doesn’t want to be seen by the paparazzi,” he said, shrugging his shoulders again.

“Just call them back and tell them that you’re going to pick them up,” I told him.

“No, I’m not leaving here.  I’m here with you; this is our time baby.  We’re talking,” he said, leaning in as he kissed my lips.

“They’re your friends and more than likely, they’ll call back,” I said.

“So what, you’re my husband,” he said, pulling me closer to him as he wrapped his arms around me, kissing my lips again.  “And that’s all that matters, you, me and our son.”

“Oh Mark,” I said, lying back on the sofa as I pulled him on top of me.

“This would be so much better in our bed upstairs baby,” he said, getting up off of me as he pulled me up.  “I love you baby.”

“I love you too,” I replied as we walked towards the stairs.

Jan 4, 2003 – Orlando, FL – Florida Hospital – Justin’s Hospital Room

“Good morning Mr. Tanner, how are you feeling this morning?”  Amy, the morning nurse asked as she walked into the room.

“I’m feeling damn fine!”  Justin snapped, rolling over in the bed, turning his back to the woman.

“I’m sorry Mr. Tanner; I didn’t mean to disturb you,” Amy replied, backing away from Justin’s bed.

“No, I’m sorry.  I—I shouldn’t have snapped at you like that,” Justin said as he rolled back over in the bed, facing the woman.

“It’s quite alright Mr. Tanner.  My name is Amy, I’ll be the nurse on duty today,” Amy informed him, smiling as she wrote her name on the dry-erase board in the room.

“Okay,” Justin replied, lying his head back down on the pillow.

“If you need anything, anything at all, just press the call button to let me know,” Amy stated as she waved, smiled and then turned to leave the room.

“Okay Amy thanks and again, I’m very sorry for the way I acted earlier,” Justin stated with a frown.

“It’s quite all right.  I’ll be back later on to check on you,” Amy replied, waving as she left the room.

“That was no way to speak to the nurse Justin,” Nick spoke as he walked into the room.

“Nick?  Baby, what’re you doing here?”  Justin asked as he looked up.

“I’m here to check on my boyfriend.  Has that become a crime?”  Nick asked as he sat on the edge of Justin’s bed.

“No—no, it’s not a crime baby.  You know what I meant,” Justin said, looking at Nick closely.  “Why are you here?  You know I can’t do what you want me to do.”

“Yes, you can.  All I want you to do is love me Justin, that’s all I want from you,” Nick softly spoke as he leaned in close and kissed Justin’s lips.  “Stay right here, don’t go anywhere, okay.”

“I’m not going anywhere for obvious reasons,” Justin stated as Nick shot him a knowing glare.  “Sorry.”

“Don’t start baby,” Nick said, walking out of the room.

“I wonder what he’s up to,” Justin said as Nick came back into the room a moment later.  “What did you just do?”

“That’s none of your business baby.  Get up, you’re coming with me,” Nick said, grabbing Justin by the hand and assisting him over to his wheelchair.

“What do you mean, I’m going with you?”  Justin asked, looking up at Nick strangely.

“Just what I said, you’re coming with me for the day.  So, stop wasting time baby,” Nick said as he tapped his foot, waiting for Justin to get moving.

“I—I don’t want to go anywhere,” Justin whine as he folded his arms across his chest.

“Come on baby, you have to go.  I have a surprise for you back at my hotel, in my room,” Nick stated as he leaned in close and kissed Justin’s lips again.

“Oh alright, help me get started,” Justin stated, motioning with his head at the bathroom.  “I’m going in there; I’ll be out in about thirty minutes or less.”

An Hour Later – The Hyatt Regency Hotel

Justin’s POV

It didn’t take us very long to get here.  After I finished handling my business and had gotten dressed, Nick came back to my room.  I don’t know what’s going on.  Before we left the hospital, he was watching me rather strangely.  As I asked him questions about what was going to take place, he did his best to avoid all of my questions as he walked around the room, gathering things he thought I would possibly need and put them in his knapsack.  The way he moved around the room scared me a bit.  He acted as if he was in a rush, trying to get everything before someone possibly caught us or something.

Before we left my room, the nurse came in with a small bag and handed it to him as he accepted it and placed it in his knapsack also.  Apparently, he talked with the nurse and arranged for me to get some pain medication, just in case I needed it.  It seems he thought of everything for our little outing today that he hasn’t told me more about.  All I know is that I’m going to be with him today and that he has a surprise for me back at his hotel room later on.

After a few minutes, we were downstairs in the parking garage as he got me into his rental care.  After that short task, we were on our way, heading someplace for our day together that would lead to my surprise at some point, that I desperately wanted to know what it was.  We rode around for a few minutes and not once did he give me any clues to where we were headed, in such a big hurry.  Should I be worried here?  What’s really going on?  What in the hell was I in for?  When we finally stopped, we were outside of a hotel.  Okay, why are we at the hotel first?  Smiling at me, he drove around to the parking garage, found his spot and then smiled at me again.  Okay, what’s about to happen to me here?

“Nick, what’s going on?  Where’s my surprise?”  I asked as he smiled and then got out of the car as he got my chair out of the trunk and then came around to my side, assisting me with getting into the chair as he wheeled me through the back of the hotel, passing the restaurant.

“We’re going up to my room silly,” he replied with a smirk on his face.

“We’re going up to your room?  Are you done with the hospital?”  I asked.

“I was officially released when Mom tried to nab me, to take me back to Tampa with her,” he said as we stopped at the elevator.

“So, you’re out of the hospital and staying here, at this hotel?”  I asked, looking down.  “Is this why I haven’t seen you in a few days?”

“Somewhat,” he replied as the doors opened as he pushed me inside and then stepped in behind me.  “I’m staying here until I can find a place to live out here.  When are you getting sprung from the clink?”

“I don’t know when I’m getting out of the hospital, it’s been weeks now,” I told him.  “They say people in my condition normally stay in the hospital for months, depending on the damage.”

“You’ve been there for a while, but I feel that will change real soon,” he said as the elevator dinged and then the doors opened as he pushed me out of the elevator and then down the hall as we stopped at a door, I guess was his room.  “Welcome welcome.”

“You’re in room 1234, why am I not surprised.  That’s the easiest room number I’ve ever seen,” I told him, laughing as he opened the room door as we both went in.

“Well this is your home for today, until you’re tired of this place and want to go back,” he said as he sat down on the sofa and then gestured with his hand for me to join him.

“What do you want Nicky?”  I asked.

“I want my man to lay down on the sofa with me,” he replied as I rolled over to him.  “Come on, do you need me to help you?”

“No, I think I can do it,” I replied as I put the brakes on and then slid out of the chair, easing over to the sofa with him.

“Move over, I’m coming down there where you are,” he said, moving down to the end of the sofa where I was.

“Why do you want to lay down here with me Nick?”  I asked.

“My name isn’t Nick, it’s baby,” he said, looking at me sternly.  “Why are you acting so strange Justin?”

“I’m not acting strange,” I replied as he shook his head.

“Yes you have been, it started the other night.  I’m still waiting on your excuse for leaving me the way you did,” he said, looking at me closely.

“I—I told you that I—I couldn’t be with you.  I—I can’t do what you want me to do,” I said, feeling the tears building up in my eyes again as I looked away from him.

“Hush baby, I’ll prove you wrong,” he said as he used his hand to turn my face to look at him as he leaned in and kissed my lips.

“What’re you doing baby?”  I asked.

“I’m proving you wrong,” he replied as he unbuttoned my shirt.

“Nick stop!”  I demanded, hoping I didn’t just scare the hell out of him.

“Nope, I’m not going to stop baby.  When you admit that you’re wrong, only then will I stop, but by then, you probably wouldn’t want me to stop and you wouldn’t have to admit that you were wrong either,” he said, kissing my lips again.

“Why—why are you doing this to me?  You’re only in for a big letdown,” I said as the tears streamed down my face.

“Let down no, something big, maybe.  I have to be sure to go slow with you,” he said as I sniffled and looked at him strangely.  “If the rumors are true about you, I’ll have a good time making love with you.”

“What rumors?”  I asked, looking at him strangely, sniffling as he kissed my lips again and then wiped at my eyes.

“The rumors floating around the industry about you being hung in the dick department,” he replied, groping my crotch now.  “Mmmm, now that’s what I call potential.”

“Please stop baby, I don’t want to ever disappoint you,” I told him, sniffing more as he shook his head.

“You will never disappoint me baby,” he said, moving down a bit.

“What’re you doing Nicky?”  I asked, feeling his hand slide under the waistband of the track pants I had on.

“I’m doing this,” he replied, his hand making contact with my dick as he moaned and then licked his lips.

“Baby don’t,” I said.

“Baby, I love you, but right now, I want you to be quiet,” he said, removing his hand from my pants as he stood up and started taking off his clothes.

“I won’t be quiet,” I said as he smiled, shook his head and then pulled my track pants down my legs.  “Give those back… Give me back my track pants!”

“No baby, not going to happen,” he replied as I sat up on the sofa, getting angry at him.

“Give those back to me damn it!”  I snapped, not knowing what to do right now because he was going to prove that I am less of a man, a man that can’t give him what he wants.

“I’m not giving you back anything, you’re going to stay here with me and enjoy this,” he said, kneeling down in front of me.

“Please Nick, just give me back my track pants and we can…” I said as he shook his head, placing a finger to my lips.

“Baby, be quiet,” he said as he touched my legs as he stared up at me.  It’s like his eyes were piercing deep into my soul

What’s going on?  I’m pissed off with him, but something in my heart is pushing that anger away.  I could feel him trying to get past my barriers and I wondered what it was he was trying to see.  He took my hand into his own and then kissed the top of it.  He massaged my legs and then smiled up at me.  I don’t know what was happening, but it felt nice.   It’s like my whole world turned upside down or something.  I felt things at that moment, that I didn’t think I would ever feel again.  He looked up at me again and then got up off the floor as he moved me back into a lying position on the sofa.

“Nick,” I said as he shook his head, placing a finger to my lips again.

He smiled and then straddled my waist as he leaned over me, kissing me tenderly on the shoulder and then down my chest as he nipped at both of my nipples.  His actions created a pleasure within me, a pleasure I hadn’t felt in a long time.  Oh God, this feel so good.

“Oh baby,” I moaned out.  “This feels so good.”

I could hardly take it.  He’s making me feel things that I thought I could never in a million years, feel again. Oh God, he’s doing things to me that I would’ve never dreamt possible, since the accident.  He’s better than anyone I’ve ever been with.  I love him so much.

“Baby, are you okay?”  He asked.

“Yeah, I—I’m okay,” I replied as he sat down on me.  “Baby, what did you just do?”

“You’re all the way in me Justin,” he answered as he leaned down and then kissed my lips.  “We’re going to take this very slowly.”

“I’m all the way in you?  What do you mean?”  I asked as he nodded his head and then smiled.

“I mean you’re all the way in me,” he replied, motioning with his head in a downward motion as he gave me the thumbs up and then smiled again.  “You’re so thick.”

“Oh God, this feels so strange, but wonderful all the same,” I said as he moved slowly up and then he came back down as that motion sent a new sensation through me and I actually felt tingles in my lap.

“Baby, do you want me to stop?”  He asked as I held onto his hips, controlling how fast he moved up and down on me.

“No—no, don’t stop baby,” I told him as he moved faster on me.  “Oh baby, I think I’m close… I think I’m close to coming.”

“I am too baby,” he replied as I felt myself going over the edge of oblivion as mini fireworks went off in my mind.

“Oh God baby, I love you!”  I screamed, my orgasm overtaking me.

“I love you Justin,” he said, stroking himself faster as he shot his load all over my chest, some of it landing on my chin.

“Oh God, baby that was wonderful,” I told him.

“Yes it was baby.  Do you still believe that you can’t make our love physical?”  He asked, looking at me with a serious expression as I was about to speak as he burst into laughter.

“I don’t believe that anymore baby.  Thank you for showing me that I’m still a man,” I said as he laid his head on my chest with my dick still buried in his ass as I felt a few tears escape the corners of my eyes.

“I love you Justin Tanner,” he said as we both drifted off into a wonderful sleep.

The Poole-Walden Estates

“Who could that be, knocking on the door right now?”  Mark asked, walking down the stairs, heading to the front door with a mean expression on his face as he got to the door and then opened it.  “Hello Angie, what’s up?  Is there something wrong with Kai, is he alright?”

“Last I heard, he was okay.  Where’s JT, I really need to talk to him,” Angela replied as she walked into the house.

“He’s upstairs, let me go get him,” Mark said as she smiled and then shook her head.

“Is he decent?”  Angela asked, looking at Mark closely.

“Yeah, he decent,” Mark replied.

“Fine, I’ll just run up and talk to him,” Angela stated with a smile.

“Okay then, let him know that I’m headed into the kitchen to fix us some breakfast,” Mark stated, kissing her on the cheek as he walked into the kitchen as she headed up the stairs.

JT’s POV

It’s an early Saturday morning and I’m lying here, in bed, basking in the afterglow of our morning lovemaking.  I really do love Mark with all of my heart, but sometimes I wonder did I make the right decision, being with him.  Mark, in all the things I love about him, he has a bad temper and when things don’t go his way, he goes off the deep end on anyone around, including me at times.  I can admit that when I was with Dean, I didn’t have to worry about bad tempers and him going off on someone when things didn’t go his way.  Hell, the problem with Dean was he was never around when I needed him to be.  When I chose to be with Mark, over Dean, I thought I was making the right decision, but sometimes I still wonder about that.  It’s been ten long years and we’re still together.  Will our love last longer than it already has?  Being that I’m getting older and I don’t think anything else is going to change with my life, I hope things between us get better.  I love Mark, I shouldn’t be thinking like this, besides Dean could never devote enough time to me and Kai.  Our relationship was mainly me, Kai and a dog and the dog spent more time in bed with me, than Dean did.  Rubbing at my eyes, the sound of knocking on the door, brought me back to reality a bit.

“Who’s knocking?”  I asked as the door opened as Angie walked in with a somewhat strange, but serious look on her face.

“Well good morning, it is a good morning, isn’t it?”  She asked, sitting down on the edge of the bed as she looked down, twiddling her fingers.

“Somewhat girl, why are you here so early in the morning?”  I asked as she looked up at me and then sighed.

“I went out with Kevin again last night,” she answered as she twirled her hair as I shook my head.

“Great, how was it?”  I asked.

“Well, I think it went okay, I just have conflicted feelings,” she replied as she moved to the head of the bed, getting close to me as she sat up against the headboard, looking me in the face.

“Why do you have conflicted feelings Angie?”  I asked.

“Kevinwasinarelationshipwithamanoncebefore,” she quickly said and then looked down as I had to look at her to try to figure out what she said.

“Whoa whoa whoa, go back and tell me that part again, I don’t think I caught all of that,” I said, trying to play over what she had said in my mind, but I wasn’t getting it.

“I said that Kevin was in a relationship with a man once before,” she said again as I noticed she had tears in her eyes that were threatening to fall.

“Girl, why do you keep putting yourself in these situations?”  I asked, holding her in my arms as she sniffled and then sighed.

“I guess I keep falling for the wrong people,” she said, wiping at her eyes.

“It’s going to be alright.  Tell me about this.  I seem to be out of the loop on this one,” I said, hoping to gain some background on this guy because all I knew about him was that he’s Nick’s friend.

“Last night, we went out and let’s just say that I had a good time, but I knew about his past and it’s going to interfere with things,” she told me as I looked at her strangely.

FLASHBACK

Downtown – The Movie Cineplex

Angie’s POV

“Well, since I don’t know what you like, I figure that seeing ‘Chicago’ with Catherine Zeta Jones would be a safe bet,” Kevin said, pulling into the parking space as he turned the car off.  When I started to open the car door, he put a hand on my arm, stopping me.  “Let me get that for you Angie.”

“Okay,” I replied with a smile as I waited for him to come around the car to open the door.

“Come on sweet girl, we’re missing the movie,” he said, offering me his hand as he kissed me softly on the lips, before closing the door behind me.

Kevin held my hand as we walked towards the theater, laughing and talking softly as we went.  I stood by the entrance, waiting while he paid for our tickets, accepting mine before we walked inside the cool, brightly lit building.  Once we got snacks and sodas, we headed hand-in-hand to the theater where our movie was showing, making it in time to see the last of the previews.

We found seats in the back of the theater and got settled in.  We sat side-by-side, sharing popcorn and kisses all throughout the movie.  I had to admit, I loved the way he made me feel when we kissed, but at the same time, I’m afraid that he’s still feeling something for the man I saw him with.  I’m trying to put that out of my mind, but it kept sneaking back in.

“Are you enjoying the movie Angie?”  He asked as I snapped out of my reverie, smiling and nodding, but my mind was obviously elsewhere and I think he noticed.

“It’s pretty good,” I replied, still not paying the screen any attention.  I looked over at his face in profile.  He is totally focused on the movie again, so I continued exploring his face with my eyes.  I love the way he looked, so intense when he’s trying to concentrate, but I’m feeling a little bit naughty.  I decided that now was a good time to redirect his attention to more important things.

I sat up a little straighter in my seat, shifting so that I was facing him.  I put my head on his shoulder, yawning loudly so that he didn’t suspect what I was about to do.  He shifted closer to me, wrapping one arm over my shoulder to bring me closer to him. I reached up and nuzzled the side of his neck with my nose.  I noticed that even though he’s still watching the movie, he’s not as intense in concentration as before.

I flicked my tongue over the shell of his ear, tugging gently on the lobe as I breathed softly on the wet skin.  Kevin shivered slightly, but still continued trying to watch the movie.  I licked a trail down the column of his neck, pausing to lick and suck lightly on the skin at the crook of his neck.  Kevin squirmed in his seat, trying to find a comfortable position, but failing miserably as I continued charting a path of kisses across his body.

I could feel his pulse under my tongue.  It’s becoming more and more erratic as I teased him, but that’s a good thing.  I ran my tongue over his Adam’s apple, swirling over it with lips and soft nips before I attached myself to it.  Kevin groaned, but not loud enough for the people near us to hear, but loud enough to let me know that he enjoyed himself.

“Angie, you—you need—fuck, to stop,” he managed to say, before I pulled his head down and attacked his lips.  I licked his lips, softly tracing the shape with the tip of my tongue, before I moved to taste his mouth.  I slipped inside of the soft, wet cavern, teasing him until he’s panting and straining to find some kind of release.

“We need to go,” he abruptly said as he stood up and then pulled me along with him.

“Wait… What about the movie?”  I innocently asked.  Kevin moved lightning fast as he spun us around and pinned me to the wall of the theater, grinding into me.  All I could do was gasp, feeling the hardness against me.

“Still want to stay for the movie?”  He asked, rocking against me as I wrapped myself around him.  I whimpered when his mouth claimed mine again, my body clinging to him like a vine.  He continued gyrating his hips, whipping me into a frenzy of passion.  He finally broke the kiss, looking down into my eyes.  “I didn’t think so… Let’s go.”

END FLASHBACK

“Wait a minute girl, are you telling me, what I think you’re telling me?”  I asked as she sniffled as I felt her moving around in my arms.  “You didn’t, did you?”

“You know how long it’s been since…” she said as I sighed this time and shook my head, wondering what else she was going to tell me.

To Be Continued…